Relationships can be very traumatic. For some, this trauma leaves a lasting impact in the form of depression. The key to preventing this, of course, is to identify a potentially damaging relationship early on and make the necessary changes. By the end of this article, you’ll know how to fight the first half of that battle.
Ready? Let’s dive right into 5 signs your relationship is making you depressed.
#1 – You’re Afraid Of Your Partner
This is a big one. If you’re afraid of your partner, you really need to ask yourself why. Is it because of their anger? Do you look at how they treat other people and worry they might do the same to you? These are all issues that should make you stop and re-evaluate your relationship. Easier said than done, yes, but it will save you from a world of trouble down the road.
Of course, there’s also the possibility that your fear stems from things more deeply rooted in your experiences and psyche than your partner’s behavior. If this is the case, you still need to put some effort into your life and relationship.
Unresolved fear goes hand in hand with depression.
#2 – Your Relationship Is Lop-Sided
Do you pull most of the weight in your relationship? According to social workers, such a relationship can lead to depression.
These sorts of relationships typically begin with one partner more than willing to make sacrifices for the other. But over time, the whole structure crumbles under its own weight and the more enthusiastic partner begins to feel – along with depression – resentment and anger.
#3 – Your Relationship Has Isolated You
When researchers looked for depression risk factors in relationships, isolation was a major one. Even brief interactions with individuals other than one’s partner can greatly reduce depression risk.
If you’re afraid that your partner will be upset with you if you try to connect with other people, see point #1.
#4 – You Have No Motivation To Improve The Relationship
The important thing here is to make the distinction between depression causing a lack of motivation and a bad relationship causing it. In the case of the latter, you should be able to pinpoint exactly why you’ve given up hope.
For example, you may be tired of having the same arguments or being exposed to the same abuse. Whatever the case, you’ve gotta make a change.
#5 – You Don’t Feel Supported By Your Partner
As part of that same study I mentioned in point #3, researchers also concluded that people in unsupportive relationships are twice as likely to develop depression. Of course, your partner isn’t going to agree with everything you do. But if you find they’re just not supporting you to prioritize your goals and values, there’s a problem.
Wondering what you should do if your relationship is depressing you? Check out this awesome talk from Dr. Sophie Henshaw!