Here’s the reason why your BFFs are always from your secondary school
Here’s a simple quiz for you: if you’re a working adult now, how did you know most of your best friends whom you are still hanging out with? And ask your colleagues who might be sitting beside you: where did they first meet their current best friends?
If the answer is “oh, they’re my secondary school friends,” then you’re not alone. In fact, if you think about it, most of our best friends were known in secondary school.
Ever wonder why? Well, the answer is a little complex, but here’s why.
Firstly, when you were in primary school, your life would all be about schoolwork, teachers and your parents. Outings were usually family outings, as your parents would not trust you to go out alone with your friends. Therefore, you didn’t become close to them.
When you were in secondary school, you started to gain some freedom. During this period, you were also looking for yourself and finding your own identity—in the midst of this, you tried new things. You tried going out alone with your friends. You tried making new friends from other classes. You tried to be rebellious.
In the process of finding yourself, you need company, and that’s when the friends in your school, who were also finding themselves, join you. No one has anything to lose. That’s when the journey to adulthood was shared with these friends.
When you get into tertiary school, you realize those classmates of yours can’t really be friends—in order to get that A’s or to get the girl, they’ll go all out, including stabbing you in the back. You tried making friends, but realize that trust is lost, because that’s also when you face the harsh reality of a “dog-eat-dog” world.
When you start work, the dog-eat-dog world goes to a whole new level—people, in order to survive (keep their job), would be forced to do even meaner things to you behind your back. It’s not that they’re evil—it’s just that in the corporate world, it’s an urban jungle, and you either kill or get killed.
So, if you realize, the only real friends that have no secret agenda and are close to you were your secondary school friends. And since they live pretty close to you as well (as most students from a particular secondary school would live in the neighbourhood), hanging out with them is not only fun, but the journey home is faster too.
So, now you know.